News Headline: “Shares of Twitter dropped in trading Wednesday to their lowest point since the company went public in November. Investor concern remains over”
Sorry. Ran out of characters.
News Headline: “21 wonderful words for wind.”
News Headline: “What if you piled every human on Earth into the Grand Canyon?”
When reporters have time on their hands. . . .
News Headline: “Dark matter could send asteroids crashing into Earth.”
Wait. Take it easy.
Chances are we wouldn’t even see it coming.
So there isn’t anything to worry about.
News Headline: “House passes Ryan budget with big cuts to foods stamps, Medicaid, student aid.”
News Headline: “House votes to give D.C. more penthouses.”
C’mon, Tea Party.
The least you can do is be a little more subtle.
News Headline: “Cliven Bundy’s racism should have been easy to predict.”
News Headline: “LA Clippers owner Donald Sterling banned for life.”
Good. Now we can go back to waiting to be wildly astonished at the next public figure to let his racism slip.
Redmond High School in Redmond, Ore., has named 29 valedictorians.
News Headline: “Head injury turns man into math whiz.”
News Headline: “Math error halts Bank of America’s stock buyback and dividend increase.”
We might want to consider lining up all the bank executives on Wall Street and slapping each in the face.
You know. To help with the math.
News Headline: “Film crew finds Atari ET games in New Mexico archaeological dig.”
Archaeologists finding video games?
Feeling a little older now, are we?
A Canadian driver who was speeding and talking on a cell phone when she hit and killed a bicycling teenager has sued the teenager’s family for $1.35 million because of emotional trauma she suffered as a result of killing the teenager.
News Headline: “The U.S. is not a democracy but an oligarchy, study concludes.”
B.R., a Chicago reader, writes:
“Oligarchy? Isn’t the better word plutocracy?”
We live in a nation where the wealthiest few increasingly run the show and engage in many corrupt practices, which they largely get away with.
This is because we, the people, have repeatedly voted in ways that allow this to happen.
So we’re talking about a vibrant democracy.
WRITE TO QT: firstname.lastname@example.org