In other news. . . .

News Headline: “Jared Kushner targeted by deranged man with metal pole.”
All right. Who gave the president a metal pole?

Put another way. . . .

News Headline: “Kelly denies he called Trump an idiot.”
Donald Trump’s associates have in recent months reportedly called  him an idiot, an imbecile, a fool and a moron.
But that still leaves ignoramus, dimwit, thickhead, numbskull. . . .
So little time.
So much to do.

Unregulated militias in the news

News Headline: “NRA Convention will allow guns, except when Trump and
Pence speak.”
NRA leaders are no fools.
Unlike NRA members.

QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language

News Item: “. . . tittering on the brink of financial collapse. . . .”
So at least they see the humor in it.
News Headline: “Pedestrian hit by car released from hospital.”
And why the hospital released the car, we may never know.

Russian assets in the news

News Headline:
“Russian lawyer who met with Trump Jr. during election admits she’s an ‘informant’ for the Kremlin.”
QT Abridged Too Far Dictionary of the English Language:
informant noun 1. one who. . .  who. . .  what is the word. . .  colludes. 2. and the collusions continue. 3. and here we  are.

A wee mistake

Alex Springer, a Denver reader, regarding a QT news headline–“Trump lawyer says he’ll pead the Fifth in porn actress case”–writes:

” ‘Pead the Fifth.’ Was that an intentional typo?”
QT is not that clever.
And it is reluctant to joke about any of Donald Trump’s adventures at the Moscow Ritz.
That would be yellow journalism.


From Poor QT’s Almanack

On this day in history 421 years ago, the German astronomer Johannes Kepler was wed, an April 27 wedding day shared 384 years later with Ringo Starr, in what likely was a coincidence.

QT 2018 vote count countdown update

News Headline:
“Trump’s ‘Fox & Friends’ rant was beyond unhinged.”
Donald Trump was merely unhinged until now.
This is known as growing in office.

We have seen the present, and it does not work

Penn State University has informed the student Outing Club that it will no longer be allowed to go outdoors.
Among activities now “above the university’s threshold of acceptable risk” are nature walks in the woods.
The school instead recommends that the club show movies about the outdoors.

The president will please rise

News Headline: “Trump lawyer says he’ll plead the Fifth in porn actress case.”
News Headline: “Trump once said pleading the Fifth is for mobsters.”
And Donald Trump’s word is good enough for QT.