Today’s Chuckle

Jonathan Saenz
News Headline: “Texas anti-gay lobbyist’s wife left him to be with a woman.”
Sometimes life is fair.

Innocent expression of gratitude will arrive
between 1 p.m. and 4 p.m.

Comcast

News Headline: “Comcast: It’s ‘insulting’ to think there’s anything shady about us paying $110,000 to honor an FCC commissioner.”
Exactly so.
Heavens to Betsy, what a dreadful thing to think.

Nothing to worry about here

Obama, fellow senators, visit U.S. forces in Iraq
News Headline: “Obama to send 130 additional military advisers to Iraq.”
Fine. A few additional advisers never hurts.
And we can expect regular progress reports from Gen. Westmoreland.

This way to the egress

El Rushbo
News Headline:
“Rush Limbaugh: Robin Williams killed himself due to ‘leftist world view.’ ”
How does a man such as this maintain any following at all?
Sometimes we forget:
There’s a dittohead born every minute.

From Poor QT’s Almanack

Beware the ides of National Water Quality Month.

QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language

PGA
T.B., a Chicago reader, writes;
“I was watching the PGA Championship and noticed that one of the commentators liked to used the word ‘err.’ I noticed it because he mispronounced it at least a half-dozen times. As you have said, ‘err’ should rhyme with ‘sir,’ not ‘air.’ ”
Pronunciations evidently weren’t the man’s forte.
Which rhymes with “sort.”
Just as “dour” rhymes with “your.”
And “sheik” rhymes with “cake.”
And as far as these pronunciations are concerned, QT will continue to inveigle.
Which rhymes with “eagle.”
Which brings us back to golf.
So these things do work out.

WRITE TO QT:  qt@zaysmith.com

Location, location, location

Bank Vault
News Headline: “Wall Street criminals are still a protected class.”
News Headline: “Police nab bank robbery suspect.”
When will these suspects learn?
For a bank robbery to work, the bank has to do the robbing.

QT trickle-on economics update

Boardroom
Profits have grown five times faster than jobs since 2001 at the 100 largest publicly-traded U.S. corporations.
The pay at the jobs has remained about the same.

May he improvise in peace

Robin Williams
News Headline: ” ‘Mrs. Doubtfire’ sequel in doubt after Robin Williams’ death.”
No kidding.
Or try it this way:
Robin Williams was the Jonathan Winters of his generation.
And can higher praise be offered?

QT Worldwide Man-Bites-Dog Pinpoint Locator

Buddy 5
We have arrived at the 40th and final dog day of summer.
There were no reports of a man biting a dog during any of the dog days.
Dogs can rest easy now.
Or there is always the element of surprise. . . .