News Headline: “Donald Trump to cut NATO funding.”
Just a little early Christmas shopping for the nation’s enemies.
But Trump should have kept it a surprise.
Can it be time for QT’s Christmas Reminders of the Season?
Ho, Ho, Ho!
+ The reindeer’s name isn’t Donner, but Donder.
+ It isn’t Kris Kringle, but Kriss Kringle.
+ It isn’t “God rest ye, merry gentlemen,” but “God rest ye merry, gentlemen.”
+ It isn’t “It came upon a midnight clear,” but “It came upon the midnight clear.”
+ It isn’t “toll the ancient Yuletide carol,” but “troll the ancient Yuletide carol.”
+ The poem isn’t “The Night Before Christmas,” but “A Visit from St. Nicholas.”
And one more:
Christmas pudding should be stirred clockwise.
And with a wooden spoon.
Ho, Ho, Ho!
Happy (QT offers this statement without representation or warranty as to the effects or repercussions thereof upon any and all persons who might elect to celebrate the holiday as represented therein and with the understanding that any persons taking such actions without such representation or warranty do so with the express understanding that they have agreed to indemnify and hold QT harmless from the effects thereof) Thanksgiving!
+ Women were not invited to the first Thanksgiving.
+ A group of turkeys is a gang of turkeys.
Rush Limbaugh regarding the message of Thanksgiving:
“The true story of Thanksgiving is how socialism failed. With all the–”
Oh, be quiet.
And the annual reminder:
+ The thing above the turkey’s beak is the snood.
+ The thing below the beak is the wattle.
Walmart will again keep its stores open on Thanksgiving this year.
And it will again cut off all holiday pay for its workers.
Meanwhile, the Walton family, billionaire founders of Walmart, has doubled its worth more than six times in the last 30 years.
Four days remain until National Stress-Free Family Holidays Month.
News Headline: “Tucker Carlson says he’s rooting for Russia, adds 45 minutes later he
You are so amusink!
News Item: “. . . was found strangled to death. . . .”
Except it is impossible to be strangled without death occurring.
Same goes for “electrocuted.”
And F.T., a Seattle reader, wants you to know she finds it nerve-racking whenever she reads about anything that is “nerve-wracking.”
And. . . .
WRITE TO QT: firstname.lastname@example.org
News Headline: “Lindsey Graham says White House told him to ‘please’ block genocide resolution.”
Politeness matters always.
Please help ignore genocide.
Please side with dictators against human rights.
And thanks for joining all the criminal cover-ups!