An image of Jesus has been discovered on a utlility pole in Laoag City, Philippines.
“Pinakaimportante ang pagsisimba,”‘ a local priest said. “Dito natin maipapakita ang paniniwala sa Diyos.”
News Headline: “North Korea says any U.S. provocation will lead to America’s
‘final doom.’ ”
Not a concern.
We attended to that six months ago.
News Headline: “FBI’s Comey defends Clinton email decision, but feels ‘nauseous.’ ”
D.S., a Boston reader, writes:
“Correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe the preferred definition of ‘nauseous’ is ‘to cause nausea.’ And if people are feeling sick, they are ‘nauseated.’ So doesn’t this mean the FBI director’s decision was sickening?”
And now we can all go back to the day’s news.
And feel nauseated.
WRITE TO QT: email@example.com
News Headline: “Paris Hilton reclaims queen of reality TV title from Kim Kardashian.”
Has it been 3,911 days since Paris Hilton announced she was leaving public life?
Not that anyone is counting.
News Headline: “House passes Obamacare repeal-and-replace bill after chaotic setbacks; Senate fight now looms.”
Nobody knew making poor people sick could be so complicated.
News Headline: “Woman convicted of laughing at Jeff Sessions during hearing faces year in jail.”
Set aside the indications that President Trump and Vladimir Putin have approximately the same view of freedom of speech.
The woman made a mistake.
The Trump administration is laughable.
But not funny.
Timber Creek High School in Orlando, Fla., has named 30 valedictorians.
And one salutatorian.
News Headline: “Arizona GOP lawmaker questions why we force kids to attend school.”
As President Trump has told us:
“I love the poorly educated.”
News Headline: “Republicans are moving ahead with mammoth 593-page bill to deregulate Wall Street.”
Nobody knew looting a nation could be so complicated.
Asteroid 2017 JA, which was discovered yesterday, is passing between Earth and the moon as you read this.
There is no reason for concern.
It missed, didn’t it?