Author Archives: Zay Smith

From Azerbaijan with love


News Headline: “Donald Trump’s hotel in Azerbaijan linked with corruption, Iran’s Revolutionary Guard..”
Obama wiretap!
Fake news!
Uh. Benghazi?

QT all’s well that ends wells update


News Headline: “Despite Trump claim, Keystone Pipeline won’t use only U.S. steel.”
But rest assured, it will threaten only U.S.groundwater.
And U.S. farmland.
And U.S. rivers.
And U.S. streams and. . . .
Never accuse President Trump of not putting America first.

Shhhhhh


News Headline:
“U.S. spy satellite takes off atop Atlas V for secret mession.”
U.S. intelligence may want to revisit the concept of “secret.”

Russian assets in the news


News Headline:  “ ‘Purge leftists’: Trump supporter Rep. Steve King wants the president to root out those who oppose him.”
Pssst.
Ixnay onway ethay Ussianray ingolay.

From Poor QT’s Almanack


On this day in history 180 years ago, Mexican soldiers stormed a mission fort and ended a Texas Revolution siege, showing how well, finally, big walls work, although the lesson is lost on those don’t remember the Alamo.

GovernMania MMXVII


News Headline:
“Trump claims electoral win was ‘biggest since Reagan.’ ”
News Headline: “Trump claims largest inauguration audience in history.”
News Headline: “Trump tweets conspiracy theory about Obama wiretapping him.”
News Headline: “American man believes he’s king of England.”
The stories seemed to go together, for some reason.

Bullwinkle has no comment


News Headline:
“Moose sex corridor for endangered populations expands.”
Stay with QT for the latest news and information on moose sex corridors.

QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language


Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Alberta) on
a meeting between Attorney General Jeff Sessions and the Russian ambassador during the 2016 presidential campaign:
“Everyone is in high dungeon about the meeting.”
Rich Rzadski, a Chicago reader, notes that it isn’t “dungeon,” which is what Ted Cruz rates being thrown into, but “dudgeon,” which is a state of anger.
And is it time for QT’s annual reminder that that it isn’t “heart-wrenching” and “gut-rending.” but “heart-rending” and “gut-wrenching”?
Almost.
But not quite.

WRITE TO QT:  qt@zaysmith.com

Unindicted co-conspirators in the news

News Headline: “Top Kremlin diploman calls U.S. uproar over Russia ties a ‘witch hunt.’ ”
News Headline: “Donald Trump: ‘Total witch hunt’ over attorney general.”
QT Abridged Too Far Dictionary of the English Language:
witch hunt noun 1. A search for and subsequent persecution of a supposed witch. 2. a phrase used by politicians as investigations close in [see: охота на ведьм].

In other news. . . .


News Headline: “Muslims raise $91,000 for vandalized Jewish cemetery.”
News Headline: “Muslim veterans offer to guard Jewish sites across the U.S.”
What will these Muslims try next?