Author Archives: Zay Smith

QT Super Bowl LI countdown updVIII

News Headline: “Super Bowl LI by the numbers.”
A couple of numbers that didn’t make it into the story:
+ NFL revenues are more than $XIII billion a year.
+ Taxpayers have provided the funds for XLVI percent of NFL stadium construction in the past XX years.

The magic of the free marketplace in the news

News Headline:House Republicans vote to end rule stopping coal debris from being dumped in streams.”
This shouldn’t be confused with plans to end limits on methane emissions from oil
and gas wells.
Hard to keep track with so many people working to save us from government regulation.

Bright shiny objects in the news

News Headline:
“Hedgehog transfixed by big pink balloon.”
News Headline: “Trump supporters unwavering after first week.”
The two stories seemed to go together, for some reason.

QT Super Bowl LI countdown updVIII

NFL players were arrested in MMXVI.
III NFL players have been arrested so far in MMXVII, with  III days to go until
Super Bowl LI.
The NFL is right.
Looks better with Roman numerals.

Modern education + the criminal mind =

One of three men burglarizing houses in the Seattle area was on parole and wearing a GPS monitoring device, police said.

‘You’re hired!’

News Headline:
“Trump treating Supreme Court pick like an episode of the ‘The Apprentice.’ ”
The president would never show such disrespect for this institution.
Now back to “Judging with the Stars.”

We have seen the present, and it does not work

The British Medical Association has recommended that pregnant women not be called “expectant mothers,'” as this might offend people who are transgender.

QT news presented without comment

A Denver police commander ‘s announcement to airport protesters:
“Stop doing anything that could be construed as free speech without a permit.”

Breaking news. . . .

News Headline: “White House website removes judiciary from being listed as part of government.”
News Headline:  “After controversy, judicial branch returns to”
An innocent mistake.
There are no plans to replace the judiciary until later in the first term.

This just in. . . .

News Headline: “Geneticist launches bid for U.S. Senate.”
He may face a tough welcome.
As Republicans on Capitol Hill will tell you, biology is only a theory.