News Headline: “U.S. spies say Trump’s performance suggests he is either a ‘Russian asset’ or a ‘useful idiot’ for Putin.”
Please let’s get the definitions straight.
Donald Trump is a Russian asset.
Those who still cheer him are useful idiots.
An “anti-racism” conference at the University of Edinburgh announced that there would be no questions allowed from white students.
News Headline: “Mobster gets 14 years for extortion.”
Didn’t have William Barr for a personal lawyer.
Paul Steiner, a Mount Juliet, Tenn., reader, regarding a news story about an assault committed with a banana and QT’s noting that any defendant would be tried by a jury of his pears, writes:
“Were gang members involved? There may have been a bunch.”
+Bill Hallihan, a Chicago reader, writes:
“Will the defendants be able to orange bail?”
+ Chris Johnson, an Elgin, Ill., reader, writes:
“This is a case that could be overturned on a peel.”
+ Bill Wade, a Chicago reader, writes:
“It may be hard to avoid slip-ups.”
+ Gene Christianson, an Overland Park, Kan., reader writes:
“And who would dole out the punishment?”
+ Dave Carr, an Owen Sound, Ontario, reader, writes:
“I’m sure authorities will get a handle on this, kumquat may.”
Stop it now.
+ Tim Contreras, a San Antonio reader, writes:
“Kiwi please stop this?”
As QT was saying. . . .
News Headline: “Trump impeachment drama: ‘This will only get uglier.’ ”
Hard to imagine it getting–
News Headline: “Devin Nunes says Democrats tried to get nude pictures of Trump from Ukrainians.”
OK. Maybe it could.
News Headline: “Omaha police investigate ‘assault with a banana.’ ”
Anyone arrested will be tried by a jury of his pears.
QT will stop it now.
WRITE TO QT: email@example.com
News Headline: “Donald Trump tweets in all-caps as damning impeachment evidence
But he can look on the bright side.
Anything to take the public’s mind off what he is HIDING IN THE TAX RETURNS.
Or the MENTAL INSTABILITY.
Not to mention the SEX-ASSAULT ACCUSATIONS. . . .
News Headline: “Did Trump betray his country?”
News Headline: “What is Trump hiding?”
News Headline: “Who does Trump think he’s fooling?”
News Headline: “Will Trump throw Giuliani under the Ukraine bus?”
Yes, what isn’t he, whom, beep beep.
See how easy?
News Headline: “Yellowstone eruption could plunge U.S. into darkness for ‘very long time’ and ‘poison water.’ ”
Not unlike the Trump administration.
News Headline: “Trump tweets he’s treated worse than any other president.”
Will someone please tell him?
He has the right to remain silent.