Georgia College in Milledgeville, Ga., has named 14 valedictorians.
No word on how many salutatorians.
News Headline: “Sailors instructed to ‘clap like we’re at a strip club’ for Mike Pence.”
Some of Pence’s evangelicals might hear you.
And want to know the strip club’s address.
News Headline: “Did William Barr lie to Congress?”
News Headline: “Free college?”
News Headline: “Are robots coming for your job?”
News Headline: “Is Bernie Sanders likable enough to become president?”
News Headline: “Are you a microaggressor?”
Yes, yes, yes, who wants to know, just a little.
See how easy?
News Headline: “Trump Fed pick said in 2016 he supported removing ‘a lot’ of child labor laws.”
News Headline: “Trump proposes asylum seekers pay a fee for their applications.”
There are 238 days until Christmas.
And each day we become a little more like Pottersville.
News Headline: “Donald Trump goes on wild retweet rampage.”
Will the world ever forgive us for being so carefree with our nuclear codes?