News Headline: “Donald Trump is glad the U.S. is not being powered by wind ‘because it only blows sometimes.’ ”
In a related development, Trump’s Space Force announced new safety precautions for its plan to land on the sun.
The astronauts will go at night.
News Headline: “The NRA is trying to block the Violence Against Women Act.”
But don’t think for a moment the National Rifle Association discriminates against women.
It remains deeply committed to violence against all Americans.
News Headline: “Nine-year-old boy opens lemonade stand to pay for grandfather’s cancer treatment.”
In other news, Republicans have found their new health-care plan.
News Headline: “Study underlines dangers of edible marijuana.”
So be sure to smoke your marijuana.
That is you QT Health and Fitness Tip for today.
News Headline: “McConnell again blocks resolution calling for release of Mueller report.”
In a related development, McConnell’s soul is no longer listed on eBay.
Ode on an Opening Day
That’s a fly ball
Deep to right.
Back. . . back. . . .
The poet was the late Jack Brickhouse.
And there is nothing more to say.
News Headline: “Cheetahs in southern Africa are closer to extinction than thought.”
So there is something these days, after all, that is closer to extinction than thought.
News Headline: “Lack of discoveries is damaging prospects for next big particle collider.”
If subatomic particles could laugh. . . .
A minister in Plover, Wis., regarding a Bible that has survived two church fires:
“Truly a work of God.”
There was no comment on Whose work the two church fires were.