Monthly Archives: September 2018

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QT trickle-on economics update


An anti-union training video for Amazon warns managers to be on the lookout for workers using such suspicious phrases as “living wage.”

Missing in action


News Headline:
“GOP senators hide behind their chairs while a woman prosecutor questions Ford.”
C’mon. You know how it is.
Boys will be boys.
And shameless cowards will be shameless cowards.

QT long national nightmare update


News Headline:
“Russian state TV goes into overdrive defending Trump’s genitalia.”
Or did you think it wouldn’t get any worse?

Breaking news. . . .


News Item: “. . . may mark the end of civilization as we know it. . . .”
But is there a downside?

QT 2018 vote count countdown update


News Headilne:
“Colorado Republicans mock sexual assault charges against Kavanaugh.”
News Headline: “GOP Senate candidate excuses attempted rape as ‘nothing.’ ”
But let’s keep this straight:
Republicans are not pro-rape.
Republicans are soft on rape.

QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language


News Headline:
“White House clears up confusion on Rosenstein’s reported ‘verbal resignation.’ ”
No. Oral.
A verbal resignation can be spoken or on paper.
The only requirement is that it contain words.
News Headline:“Is possession nine-tenths of the law?”
J.B, a Chicago reader, writes:
“I keep waiting for your annual reminder that possession isn’t nine-tenths of the law, but nine points of the law.”
You’ve been waiting too long.
It’st time for the biennial reminder.
Sorry.
News Headline: “The stars shined brightly in Monday night win.”
Dave Carr, an Owen Sound, Ontario, reader, writes:
“I think ‘shone’ is correct. But I leave this at your shined shoes.”
“Shined” if there is an object, “shone” if there is not.
QT shined your shoes. Your shoes shone.
Now where’s QT’s five bucks?

WRITE TO QT:  qt@zaysmith.com

The gift of laughter


News Headline:
“U.N. members laugh at Donald Trump after claim his administration has ‘accomplished more than almost any in U.S. history.’ ”
That’s nothing.
Have you heard the one about the president who said that he was responsible for the strongest economy in U.S. history?
Or that his election campaign was the greatest movement in U.S history?

Or that–
That’s enough.
Laughing too hard.
We Americans got a million of ’em.
Sad to say.

From the QT news ticker


News Headline: “Could the financial crisis happen again?”
News Headline: “Is Donald Trump’s downfall hidden in his tax returns?”
News Headline:
“Are we on the verge of civil war?”
News Headline: “Has the Supreme Court lost its legitimacy?”
News Headline: “Democrats to the rescue?”
Yes, yes, no, getting there, not often.
See how easy?

Vive la résistance


News Headline: “EEOC sues Wal-Mart over disability harassment.”
News Headline: “EEOC sues Wal-Mart over pregnancy discrimination.”
So there are still a few government agencies Donald Trump hasn’t got his hands on.

Meanwhile, 3,318 miles from Washington D.C. . . .


News Headline: “In Peru, Hitler earns a ballot spot despite challenge from Lennin.”
As we finally locate a democracy that seems to be faring worse than ours.
But only seems to be.