Monthly Archives: February 2017

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QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language

News Headline:It’s settled! Creator tells us how to pronounce ‘GIF. ‘ ”
Steve Wilhite. the inventor of the Graphics Interchange Format, wants you to know that “GIF” is pronounced “JIF.”
And is it almost  time for QT’s annual reminder that the first syllable of “gigabyte” is pronounced JIG?
This is according to the U.S. Bureau of Standards.
And as sources jo, that’s as jood as it jets.
By Giminy.


QT Planetary Defense Coordination Office

Asteroid 2017 DG16 was discovered today.
It is passing between Earth and the moon as you read this.
But it has been more than three weeks since an asteroid was last discovered as it passed between Earth and the moon.
So we seem safe.

Lest we forget that the United States is Canada’s Mexico

News Item: Canada has seen a surge of refugees crossing into the country illegally from the U.S. . . . “
Canada may want to build a big wall.
And the United States will pay for it.

This just in. . . .

News Headline: “Texas man breaks into home, takes shower, puts on Betty Boop pajamas.”
As reasonable a response as any to the news of the day.

From Poor QT’s Almanack

On this day in history 198 years ago Spain ceded Florida to the United States.
Spain never could resist a good practical joke.

Frontiers of science

News Headline: “Study says drinking a glass of red wine has the same effect as going to the gym.”
Keep up the good work, researchers!

QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language

News Headline: “Creating a customer-centric business.”
News Headline: “Human-centric technologies will dominate next three years.”
News Headline: “UMass basketball preparing for LaSalle’s guard-centric offense.”
News Headline: “Four bourbon-centric events held. . . .”
. . .  just in  time for those of us at the breaking-centric point.


GovernMania MMXVII

News Headline: “Donald Trump’s ‘erratic behavior’ has medical professionals questioning his mental health.”
News Headline: “Trump supporters see a successful president.”
Needed by any president who hears voices:
Supporters who are seeing things.

From the QT police blotter

News Headline:
“Man grabs woman’s buttocks as she walks down the street.”
The police should go easy on him.
He was trying to be presidential.

We have seen the present, and it does not work

The University of Washington Tacoma’s  Writing Center has announced that “there is no inherent ‘standard’ of English” and that “citing grammatical ‘correctness’ in the production of texts” can be a racist microaggression.