News Headline: “Wal-Mart is one of the biggest beneficiaries of food stamps.”
News Headline: “Wal-Mart comes to town, other stores close, then Wal-Mart leaves.”
News Headline: “South Carolina woman rams car into Wal-Mart because she thought the Rapture was coming.”
Not when there are so many other reasons to want to ram into a Wal-Mart.
News Headline: “Scientists stunned to learn true age of Saturn’s rings.”
News Headline: “Scientists stunned to find Neanderthals gave humans herpes.”
News Headline: “Scientists stunned to witness Darwin’s finches evolve.”
Do our scientists stun too easily?
News Headline: “Donald Trump: ‘If I lose, I don’t think you will ever see me again.’ ”
Say the headline out loud.
Let it roll on your tongue.
Say it again.
Close your eyes and imagine it. . . .
News Headline: “Ten terrorists blown up while making bomb inside mosque.”
What kind of times do we live in?
Hope you enjoyed Today’s Chuckle.
News Item: “Millions of dollars Donald Trump says he raised for veterans charities are unaccounted for, and Trump’s adviser for veterans affairs doesn’t seem to know where that money is.”
The story refers to $6 million that Trump announced nearly three months ago.
But there is no reason to believe he would use military veterans as campaign props and then walk away.
No reason at all.
News Headline: “NBA: No All-Star Game for North Carolina if anti-LGBT law isn’t changed.”
So think a few good thoughts for the NBA.
Even if it does allow its players six and seven steps without a travel.
News Item: “A local atheist and a national group that advocates for the strict separation of church and state have sued the city to remove a large, white Christian cross at a public park where an 18th century Spanish Catholic mission once stood. . . .”
Lest we forget that evangelical atheists can be every bit as annoying as evangelical Christians.
News Item: “. . . The move was made after some residents had experienced severe flooding and complaints were registered at the highest levels of City Hall. . . .
. . . which is a good level of City Hall to register complaints during floods.
News Headline: “Cruz weighs in on transgender bathroom issue.”
News Headline: “Trump, Cruz turn transgender bathroom law into campaign issue.”
If you are wondering where the Republican presidential campaign is these days:
It is lurking in public toilets.