Zay N. Smith

Columnist, Humorist, Author

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QT Exploding Hoverboard Worldwide Pinpoint Locator

January 5, 2016 No Comments

Hoverboard
10:15 p.m. Sunday, January 3, on the 15000 block of Martha Street in Van Nuys, Calif.

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Toward stricter background checks for politicians

January 5, 2016 No Comments

Background Check
News Headline: “Obama: Congress needs to act on gun safety measures.”
News Headline: “Lawmakers get donations from NRA, say money doesn’t buy votes.”
The lawmakers are right.
The National Rifle Association doesn’t buy them.
It leases them with an option to buy.

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QT Yellowstone Caldera (the eruptions of which can be violent enough to send a layer of ash six feet deep as far away as Chicago and which erupts every 600,000 or so years and last erupted 640,000 years ago) update

January 5, 2016 No Comments

Earthquake Count
Yellowstone’s earthquake counts for the past six months, as of January 1, have gone from to 60 to 44 to 112 to 83 to 155 to 46.
The trend is apparent.

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Taking all things into account

January 4, 2016 No Comments

Big Banks
News Headline: “Banks reject marijuana money.”
News Headline: “Federal Reserve against marijuana earnings in banks.”
Good.
We don’t want our drug dealers falling in with a bad crowd.

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QT 2016 vote count countdown update

January 4, 2016 No Comments

Hillary Clinton
News Headline: “Pastor says Hillary Clinton will turn kids gay.”
Is there anything this woman can’t do?

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Send in the. . . .

January 4, 2016 No Comments

Obamacare Repeal
News Headline: “Republicans vote to repeal Obamacare for 58th time.”
News Headline: “House Republicans vote to repeal Obamacare for 61st time.”
News Headline: “Obamacare’s repeal is up first for GOP in 2016”
Note to C-SPAN:
You can save some effort if you cut the sound feed and put on “Yakety Sax.”

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The Making of the President 2016nado!

January 4, 2016 No Comments

Beached Whale
News Item: “. . . Trump drew a crowd of. . . .”
News Item: “. . . .the beached whale drew a crowd of. . . .”
The crowds for Donald Trump are larger than the crowds for beached whales, for those keeping track of things that draw crowds.

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Greetings and facilitations

January 4, 2016 No Comments

Happy new Year
News Headline: “One dead in New Year’s Day double shooting.”
News Headline: “Surviving victim in New Year’s triple shooting released from hospital.”
News Headline: “Four killed in New Year’s shooting identified.”
News Headline: “More than 30 killed by gun violence in U.S. on New Year’s Day.”
Happy New Year from the National Rifle Association!

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Zay N. Smith

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