News Headline: “Poll: 68 percent of Trump’s supporters would vote for him if he bolts GOP.”
OK. Let’s see.
Donald Trump’s latest support is 29 percent of Republicans.
A recent poll shows that 28 percent of Americans identify as Republicans
Which means that Trump’s support is about 29 percent of 28 percent of Americans.
And now 68 percent of Trump’s support says the support would continue if he ran as an independent.
So Trump’s hard support is about 68 percent of 29 percent of 28 percent of Americans.
Which comes to about 6 percent of Americans.
Which sounds about right.

News Headline: “NYPD officer charged in plot to kidnap, cook and eat 100 women.”
News Headline: “Appeals court clears accused ‘cannibal cop’ of all charges.”
But didn’t he promise both to protect and serve?

 
News Headline: “Donald Trump calls for ‘total and complete shutdown’ of Muslims entering the U.S.”
News Headline: “Ted Cruz touts endorsement of activist who argues killing abortion doctors should be justifiable homicide.”
We might want to keep Christians out until further notice, also.

News Headline: “Nebraska, Minnesota, San Jose St. taking 5-7 records to bowl games.”
College football is up to 40 bowl games this year, including the San Diego Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl.
So teams with losing records are now needed to fill all the openings.
Or as George Gipp said:
“Some time, Rock, when the team is up against it, when things are wrong and the breaks are beating the boys, ask them to go in there and accept just one participation award for the Gipper.”

News Headline: “Nevada lawmaker sends Christmas card featuring fully-armed family.”
The 5-year-old is holding a Walther P22.
Ho, Ho, Ho!

News Headline: “U.S. running out of bombs to drop on ISIS.”
For those keeping track of the dawning of the Age of Aquarius.

  
News Headline: “NRA defends allowing people on no-fly lists to buy guns.”
News Headline: “NY Daily News list’s NRA’s Wayne LaPierre among American terrorists.”
Nonsense.
He is only a terrorist sympathizer.

6 a.m. Saturday, December 5, near 4400 Poplar Ave. in Memphis, Tenn.

Cornell University has issued a notice that hanging a mistletoe is not in keeping with requirements for an “inclusive environment.”
Ho, Ho, Ho!

News Headline: “GOP blocks efforts to deny guns to those on terrorist watch lists.”
This is a democracy.
Our terrorists need representation, too.