“. . . going into Christmas. . . just six days before Christmas. . . .”
. . . which is why almost no one watched the New Hampshire Democratic debate.

News Headline: “At Christmas-themed rally, Donald Trump calls Hillary Clinton a ‘snake.’ ”
No more of this until after Christmas.
Every time Donald Trump is quoted, an angel loses his wings.

News Headline: “Popular Christmas toy is ‘training kids to live in a surveillance state,’ academic warns.”
News Headline: “Texas official threatens to slap people who say ‘Happy Holidays’ instead of ‘Merry Christmas.’ ”
Ho, Ho, Ho!

A school in Wynnewood, Pa., has become the latest to drop Mark Twain’s Huckleberry Finn from reading list because its accurate description of the place of blacks in the Early South makes some students “uncomfortable.”

News Headline: “Drinking champagne every day could help prevent dementia
and Alzheimer’s.”
Keep up the good work, researchers!

News Headline: “Millions of asteroids that could threaten our world remain uncatalogued.”
But you will be glad to know Asteroid 2015 YB was discovered and catalogued yesterday.
It will pass closer to Earth than the orbits of some man-made satellites tomorrow.
But keep in mind:
I the asteroid were to hit, it would, at worst, destroy everything for only five miles in every direction.
And think of all the many square miles Earth has to spare.

News Headline: “Top 5 Christmas decorations that can hurt your pets.”
News Headline: “Are your holiday cards grammatically correct?”
Ho, Ho, Ho!

News Item: “Aides to Bernie Sanders said Wednesday night that his campaign has now collected more than 2 million contributions. . . . The campaign did not release the number of unique donors. . . but aides said that figure is approaching 1 million. . . . ”
Who do these million people think they are? Corporations?

Police said a man arrested for theft in Encinitas, Calf., was carrying a  to-do list that included the entry “Shop Lift.”

News Headline: “The challenge of measuring a bird’s brain.”
News Headline: “Sheriff Arpaio revives birther controversy at Trump rally.”
Not that hard to measure, actually.