News Headline: “Schools struggle with teacher shortage.”
News Headline: “Study: Major physician shortage by 2025.”
News Headline: “Uproar over religious freedom law trips up Indiana governor.”
News Headline: “Tea Party GOP warns of bigot shortage.”
Sorry. Made the last one up.
News Headline: “With so much oil flowing, U.S. may be reaching storage limits.”
Not a concern.
All we have to do is put more in the pipelines and spill it into the rivers.
New York’s new state budget fails to increase the minimum wage but allows a tax break for buyers of yachts
An Ithaca College student praising a system that would allow anonymous reporting of students who commit “microaggressions” on campus:
“It helps to make people think a little more before they do or say something,”
QT Abridged Too Far Dictionary of the English Language:
microaggression noun 1. a form of unintended discrimination caused by behavior or expression. 2. typically slight in nature. 3. such as the UCLA professor accused of microaggression with “ideological implications” because he pointed out the incorrect capitalization of the word “indigenous” in a student paper. 4. so the Ithaca student has a point. 5. professors and students should be careful before talking. 6. probably best to avoid saying anything at all. 7. because a university works best when people keep their ideas to themselves.
News Headline: “Scott Walker: If I can handle unions, I can handle ISIS.”
News Headline: “Scott Walker suggests being an Eagle Scout has prepared him to be commander in chief.”
OK. But has he ever bought a used car?
We have to know if he’s qualified for arms treaty negotiations.
News Headline: “Does Liberty University hurt the GOP?”
News Headline: “Time to cut Israel off?”
News Headline: “In Wall Street we mistrust?”
News Headline: “What happens when a solar eclipse hits the world’s most
News Headline: “Are rights man-made?”
Yes, no, yes, not much, yes.
See how easy?
News Headline: “Killer bus-sized asteroid flies dangerously close past Earth.”
But that was last May.
In other news, bus-sized Asteroid 2025 FM118 was discovered today.
It will pass just inside the moon’s orbit tomorrow.
Best we can tell.
News Headline: “Petition created to remove Paris Hilton from Summerfest lineup.”
Mike Reynolds, a West Allis, Wis., reader, writes:
“Didn’t she say she was leaving public life?”
Now that you mention it, it’s been 2,836 days since Paris Hilton announced she was leaving public life.
Not that anyone is counting.
WRITE TO QT: firstname.lastname@example.org