News Headline: “Clinging to timelessness in a changing cosmos.”
Slow news day.
News Headline: “Belarus diplomat worries topless, mayo-throwing women could disrupt the U.N.”
Belarus diplomats seem to have more interesting worries than the rest of us.
News Headline: “Jeb Bush’s private investments in fracking dovetail with public advocacy.”
The system works.
News Headline: “Rare doomed planet with extreme seasons discovered.”
Takes one to know one.
News Headline: “23 percent of Americans don’t believe in global warming.”
News Headline: “1 in 4 Americans apparently unaware the Earth orbits the sun.”
The two stories seemed to go together, for some reason.
News Headline: “Issa: Giuliani is ‘not a partisan politician.’ ”
And how many Americans will believe that?
Figure about one in four.
News Item: “. . . . Ed Lyman, a large whale entanglement response coordinator, believes the whale has. . . .”
You may be having a difficult day at work, but at least you aren’t a large whale entanglement response coordinator.
News Item: “Canadian legislator Pat Martin offered up one of the most original excuses ever heard for hurriedly running out of the House of Commons during a vote. His new cheap pair of underpants was too tight. . . .”
News Item: “President Obama warned Monday that states will feel the pain of a Homeland Security Department shutdown if Congress can’t break an impasse by week’s end. But on Capitol Hill, no solution was in sight. . . .”
We should thank Canada today.
A viable approach now suggests itself to persuade Congress into action.
Wedgies all around.
News Item: “. . . Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker (R) has had a history of
straddling the fence. . . .”
News Item: “. . . Walker backed off. . . .”
News Item: “. . . Walker sidestepped. . . .”
News Item: “. . . that Walker stumbled over the. . . .”
. . . fence when he tried to back off and sidestep while straddling it, evidently.