Monthly Archives: January 2015

You are browsing the site archives by month.

The Tea Party would like a word with you, Mr. Speaker

Lawmakers Convene For Opening Of The 114th Congress
News Headline: “Boehner: We can disagree without being disagreeable.”
Which is what House Speaker John Boehner said in remarks today.
Except the headline is from 2010.
But we shouldn’t give up hope.
For at least another 10 minutes.

QT Rules of Etiquette for Guys and Dolls

Christmas Decorations
+ All Christmas decorations should be taken down after the Twelve Days of Christmas.
+ Which ended yesterday.
+And Christmas decorations should not go up again until the day after Thanksgiving.
+ Which is 324 days from now.
+ Ho, Ho, Ho!

And away we go!

Awaaay We Go
News Item: “A CNN ‘doomsday’ video, long discussed but never seen publicly, was published today . . . a minute-long rendition of “Nearer My God to Thee” . . . to be played at the very end of the world. . . .”
A little musical accompaniment never hurts.
But when the asteroid approaches:
Where is Jackie Gleason when humanity needs him?

Someone has earned a joke

QT Logo
Rob Bligh, an Omaha, Neb., reader, writes:
“I recall receiving a message from you containing a new-and-improved link that could be used to contribute money to support the QT Humor Service. I have lost that message. Please send me the link.”
How nice of you to ask.
The link is: http://www.patreon.com/user?u=459032
And the QT Humor Service, such as it is, dedicates the following to you:
A font of 12-point Century Gothic walks into the bar.
The bartender says, “We don’t serve your type here.”
Or earn more jokes by buying QT’s e-book, set your own price, at http://zaysmith.com/get-the-e-book-pre-release-of-qts-novel-60606/
Who know who will walk into the bar next?

WRITE TO QT:  qt@zaysmith.com

Don’t you see it?

Louie Gohmert
News Headline: “Louie Gohmert: Hate crimes bill will lead to Nazism”
News Headline: “Gohmert links gun control, bestiality.”
News Headline: “Gohmert: Just talking about immigration reform leads to child sex slavery.”
News Headline: “Gohmert tosses hat in ring for House speaker.”
Except it’s well established that so-called “hat-tossing” can lead to terrorist necrophilia.

QT Yellowstone Caldera (the eruptions of which can be violent enough to send a layer of ash six feet deep as far away as Chicago and which erupts every 600,000 or so years and last erupted 640,000 years ago) update

Yellowstone
Scientists reassure us  that ground deformations in north-central Yellowstone have returned to “near background levels” for now after “a fascinating year of ups and downs.”

When will the politicians stop letting us down?

Voter Turnout
News Headline: “Americans’ dissatisfaction with government tops concerns, Gallup poll finds.”
Not cited as a concern by Americans was their voting turnout of 36.4 percent in 2014.
Probably just one of those oversights.

From Poor QT’s Almanack

Wagner Tuba
Today’s Birthdays: “Der Fliegende Hollander,” 172; “Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy,” 74.

Resolved. . . .

QT
News Headline: “18 apps to help you keep your New Year’s resolutions.”
That is, for those who didn’t resolve not to acquire any more apps this year.
Or there is always this New Year’s resolution:
I resolve to support QT’s efforts in a new way.
Medi.ci is gone.
Patreon.com is here.
It can be done at this link.
Nothing was said about resolving not to use links.
And support in any amount is appreciated.

Greetings and facilitations

NRA
News Headline: “Three men shot outside New Year’s Eve party in Jersey City.”
News Headline: “Victims identified in Chattanooga New Year’s shootings.”
News Headline: “Shootings on New Year’s Eve and New Year’s morning keep San Francisco police busy.”
Happy New Year from the National Rifle Association!