Beware the ides of National Stress-Free Family Holidays Month.
News Headline: “Former CIA chief Hayden: Legally, it’s not torture.”
And it’s time we got our terminology straight.
All together now:
It’s not “torture.”
It’s “enhanced interrogation techniques.”
In other news, police in Omaha, Neb., were seeking three masked men with guns suspected of subjecting a bank there to enhanced withdrawal techniques.
News Headline: “Rick Perry: Running for president ‘is not an IQ test.’ ”
News Headline: “Texas oil and gas regulators say they tried to enforce rules, lost jobs.”
News Headline: “Despite corruption charges, Rick Perry moves full steam ahead.”
Evidently not an ethics test, either.
News Headline: “The federal government now employs the fewest people since 1966.”
Another reason to be grateful the Tea Party is around.
Big government is clearly out of control.
News Item: “A family is fuming mad after a Southwest Airlines employee parked a wheelchair-using grandmother for 11 hours at an airport, having apparently forgotten her. . . .”
And wait until the airline hits them with it $75 grandmother recovery fee.
News Headline: “Illinois Comptroller Judy Baar Topinka dies at 70.”
QT was writing a series of items on accordions in 1998 when a call came in.
It was Judy Baar Topinka, then the state treasurer.
She wanted QT to know that the Illinois state budget was the equivalent of 83,111,111 accordions.
On a number of levels, public servants did not come better than Judy Baar Topinka.
+ Dan Skowron, a Romeoville, Ill., reader, regarding the news story of a stolen 5,000 pound bridge recovered by police, which, QT concluded, happened after detectives checked with local fences, writes:
“Was this reported on C-SPAN?”
+ W.S., an Evanston, Ill., reader, writes:
“Enough about the infrastructure. You need to curb your enthusiasm.”
+ M.R., a Nashville, Tenn., reader, writes:
“I understand one of the detectives almost botched the bridge investigation. So he’s under suspension.”
Stop it now.
WRITE TO QT: firstname.lastname@example.org
Sabrina Rubin Erderly, reporter of a Rolling Stone story that failed to verify a number of details regarding sexual assaults at the University of Virginia, on her approach to the news:
“My tendency is to believe people, My default mode is you are probably telling the truth.”
Kids, go get grandpa and ask him what it was like when the default mode of reporters was “If your mother says she loves you, check it out.”