News Item: “. . . The incident prompted a response from an air ambulance, a dog-sniffing rescue team and. . . .”
And why a rescue team would go around sniffing dogs, we’ll never know.
News Headline: “Scientists find new species of blood-sucking ‘Dracula ants.’ ”
News Headline: “New species of flesh-eating sponges discovered.”
Does this mean the Intelligent Designer is back in rehab?
News Headline: “Another Rick Perry ‘oops’ moment.”
News Headline: “Perry leaves children behind as cuts squeeze Texas schools.”
News Headline: “Perry doubles down against Medicaid expansion.”
News Headline: “Perry declines to call botched execution inhumane.'”
News Headline: “2016 watch: Texas’s Rick Perry books another Iowa tour.”
So this is what the presidential campaign will soon offer us: George W. Bush with a mean streak.
News Headline: “Want to seem smart? Add a middle initial to your name.”
Justin D. Bieber. Paris W. Hilton, Sarah L. Palin. . . .
OK. So it doesn’t always work.
News Headline: “Anti-gay marriage GOP candidate explains his past as a drag queen.”
No need to explain.
We know the Republicans are rebranding.
South Dakota Republican U.S. Senate candidate Annette Bosworth in an Internet posting:
“THE FOOD STAMP PROGRAM IS ADMINISTERED BY THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF AGRICULTURE. THEY PROUDLY REPORT THAT THEY DISTRIBUTE FREE MEALS AND FOOD STAMPS TO OVER 46 MILLION PEOPLE ON AN ANNUAL BASIS. MEANWHILE, THE NATIONAL PARK SERVICE, RUN BY THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF AGRICULTURE, ASKS US, ‘PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS.’ THEIR STATED REASON FOR THIS BEING THAT ‘THE ANIMALS WILL GROW DEPENDENT ON THE HANDOUTS, AND THEY WILL NEVER LEARN TO TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES. THAT CONCLUDES TODAY’S LESSON. . . .”
. . . . as corporate supporters nodded knowingly, and went back to their troughs.
The U.S. Geological Survey announced this week that a major ground deformation at Yellowstone “abruptly changed direction” on April 6, following the largest earthquake there in 34 years.
But geologists said it was no reason for concern.
So that’s a relief, isn’t it?
News Item: “. . . didn’t prove to the jury’s satisfaction that she was in eminent danger. . . .”
C.M., a Chicago reader, figures the hazards didn’t seem distinguished enough.
And is it time for QT’s biennial reminder that pictures are hung and condemned prisoners are hanged?
WRITE TO QT: email@example.com
News Headline: “What your car says about you.”
Behind your back, evidently.