In other news. . . .

News Headline: “What to expect from Xi-Trump summit.”
Same as usual.
He said, Xi said.

QT loud guy at the end of the bar update

News Headline: “Trump’s approval rating drops to new low of 36 percent.”
News Headline: “Trump’s approval rating lower than Obama’s ever was.”
Couldn’t manage it with the popular vote, the electoral vote or the Inauguration crowds.
But he finally beat Obama at something.

This just in. . . .

News Headline: “Nine-year-old boy opens lemonade stand to pay for grandfather’s cancer treatment.”
In other news, Republicans have found their new health-care plan.

Unindicted co-conspirators in the news

News Headline: “Trump-Russia investigation: House Intelligence Committee ‘cancels all meetings this week.’ ”
Nobody knew cover-ups could be so complicated.

QT news you can use

T.D., a Chicago reader, writes:
“You’ve been telling us for days about zero sunspots on the sun. The other day, you said it was the 16th day in a row without sunspots. And then you say we shouldn’t be concerned. OK. I’m concerned. Are we still sunspotless?”
No.There are suddenly 12 sunspots on the sun.
But don’t give it another thought.


Credit where credit is due

News Headline: “Was Trump Putin’s fool or partner in crime?”
And who said our president can’t multi-task?

Breaking news. . . .

News Headline: “It is now illegal in Ohio for humans to have sex with animals.”
In other news, it was legal until now.

QT Early Warning System

News Item:“New Arkansas concealed-carry law brings guns to colleges, arenas, bars and state capitol.”
As we add to the Arkansas chapter in QT’s Travel Guide to Places in the U.S. You’ll Want to Stay Out of for Any Number of Reasons.

QT Planetary Defense Coordination Office

Asteroids 2017 FN1 and 2017 FM1 were discovered yesterday as they passed between Earth and the moon.
These are not to be confused with Asteroid 2017 FS, which was discovered Sunday as it passed between Earth and the moon.
But all  were smallish asteroids.
At worst, if one of them had hit Earth, it would have destroyed an area only as large as, say, the Trump International Golf Club in West Palm Beach, Fla.
To take a random example.

From the annals of the Federal Department of Police Squad

Every African delegate planning to attend this year’s African Global Economic and Development Conference in California was denied a visa to enter the United States.