News Headline: “About 1 in 4 Americans would follow Trump to the end.”
News Headline: “1 in 4 Americans unaware the Earth orbits the sun.”
It’s all starting to make sense now.

News Headline: “10 cities waiting for Trump campaign to pay his security bills.”
The experienced grifter knows to keep moving from town to town.

Six days remain until the 658th Turkish Oil-Wrestling Festival in Edirne.
Edirne is five miles west of Unrulu.

News Headline: “Trump interview on ABC was a ratings bust.”
Lest we forget that Donald Trump is not a political leader with supporters.
He is a TV star with fans.
And fans start checking other channels after a while.

News Headline: “Bosses pocket Trump tax windfall as workers see job promises vanish.”
News Headline: “This is the longest the federal minimum wage has ever gone without being raised.”
The system works.

News Headline: “Full list of asteroids that could crash into Earth.”
Enough with the scare headlines.
Not a single asteroid has come close to Earth in three weeks.
Except for Asteroids 2019 LY4 and 2019 LW4.
Which passed between Earth and the moon on June 6 and June 8, respectively.
And which were finally discovered today.
Except for those.

News Headline: “Donald Trump calls George Stephanopoulos a ‘little wise guy’ in ABC interview.”
Someone should tell the tubby loudmouth not to make fun of the appearance of others.
Wait. How did that get in there?
QT apologizes.

News Headline: “Who will replace Sarah Sanders as White House press secretary?”
News Headline: “O.J. Simpson tells Twitter followers he wants to ‘set the record
straight.’ ”
Asked and answered.

This is a the 26th day in a row with no sunspots on the sun.
But don’t give it a second thought.